My Friend Peppa Pig is the 10th game of UUGPGC Year 3! Finish by May 20. Spoilers open!

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bigsocrates

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#1  Edited By bigsocrates  Online

EDIT: SPOILERS ARE NOW OPEN

ORIGINAL MESSAGE:

BLAME @chamurai! Also @arbitrarywater and @zombiepie! THEY BROUGHT THIS DARKNESS UPON US!

Welcome to the Unsanctioned Unofficial Game Pass Game Club Year 3! Our 10th game of 2024 is, *big sigh*, you can do this @bigsocrates, you have to do this, My Friend Peppa Pig. The target completion date is May 20, 2024.

We ask that until that date you use the forum software to mark any spoilers, either story based or mechanical, in the discussion below. Ideally the bulk of the discussion will occur after May 20, but if you want to comment before then you are welcome to so long as the spoilers are marked. We ask that if you leave a comment before that date you also come back to the thread after it to read other people’s comments and respond to them, though of course we cannot force you to do so.

All are welcome to participate regardless of whether you have stated a preference to or not and there is absolutely no commitment. You do not have to finish the game to participate but please let us know if you have not.

You are also free to come back any time after the completion date and share your thoughts! This club is meant to be open to all whenever you want to join in the fun!

You can find out more about the Unsanctioned Unofficial Game Pass Game Club or suggest future games for it here.

What is My Friend Peppa Pig?

A game for very young children where you go around as a new friend of Peppa Pig talking to people and interacting with stuff, I don't know, it's literally a baby game for babies.

How long is My Friend Peppa Pig?

How long to beat lists it as the single longest hour of your life long.

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#2  Edited By chamurai

Edit: The people have spoken! We won't be shamed into silence.

...

What have I done?

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My Adventures with Peppa Pig.

I chose a fox looking character with cool shades and a sick ass pink cap with a skull on it. And I'm wearing it BACKWARDS like a real punk. I walked over to Peppa's house and Mrs. Rabbit tells me where Peppa's house is. I then found a puddle of mud and had to jump in and get muddy cuz what are you even doing with your life if you don't jump in a mud puddle?

I made it to Peppa's house completely clean, apparently mud puddles aren't canon, and Peppa greets me at her house. We go upstairs to her room and I change into a pirate suit and we play tag with her brother George. Despite tagging Peppa and George multiple times they don't actually chase or tag me in return. They're just running around pretending that I didn't actually touch them. That's called cheating you little brats!

We go downstairs and find Daddy Pig making a salad. He says "Arr!" cuz I'm still dressed as a pirate. I tried to change back to my old badass clothes but it wouldn't let me. He asks me to mix it and I mix it up real good. Daddy Pig complemented my mixing skills. I'm a good helper. We go into the next room where Mommy Pig is reading a book. She says "Arr!" to me. Curse this pirate suit! I turn on the Telly and Mr. Potato is on. Peppa likes Mr. Potato, I have no opinions on it.

Daddy Pig comes into the room and says he has lost his glasses. Peppa and I go out to look for his glasses. I look in the trash can in the kitchen, they're not there. I look in the entrance, they're right there next to the stairs. How they got there I have no idea. I give them back to Daddy Pig and I get an achievement for 80 points. Wow!

We go outside and I'm suddenly back in my regular clothes. Hell yeah. Peppa suggests we go to her Grandparent's place down the way. We both jump into a mud puddle we find on the way there. Getting dirty is the best. We make it to Grandpa and Grandama Pig's place and I click on the first object I pass by there, the car. Suddenly, without being introduced to the elderly couple, we are driving to the beach. But I wanted to see Grandpa and Grandma Pig's house! So much potential history there! Oh the stories that Grandpa Pig surely had to tell that I'll never get to experience!

We make it to the beach but this is apparently a beach that has no sand. I didn't even know that was a thing. Grandpa and Grandma Pig try to gaslight us into thinking that walking on jagged rocks looking for puddles is just as good as building sandcastles but I know better. I wonder what I'll find in the puddle? Treasure perhaps?

Anyways, that's all for now. Stay tuned for the next installment of "My Adventures with Peppa Pig"

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I'm not gonna lie, having to sit through the whole intro without being able to skip it everytime I trun the game on is an ordeal.

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#5  Edited By bigsocrates  Online

I started this. It's not even really a game. It's closer to a cross between one of those child activity tables where you spin random things and move them along a wire and a story book. There are no real objectives and very few interactions. Everything about it is obnoxious.

It is somehow worse than I thought it would be and I thought it would be truly awful. I hate Peppa Pig but not as much as I hate @chamurai

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@bigsocrates: But now you're friends with Peppa Pig and I'm friends with Peppa Pig too! And they say the friend of my friend is my friend so we're totally cool now. That's just math.

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#7  Edited By bigsocrates  Online

@chamurai:

WHAT KIND OF ABSOLUTE PSYCHO TELLS A CHILD TO HANG THEIR UGLY PICTURE IN THE HOME OF SOMEBODY THEY'VE LITERALLY JUST MET?
WHAT KIND OF ABSOLUTE PSYCHO TELLS A CHILD TO HANG THEIR UGLY PICTURE IN THE HOME OF SOMEBODY THEY'VE LITERALLY JUST MET?

YEAH, CHAMURAI, GO HELP PEPPA CLEAN THE WHOLE DAMNED FOREST! I'LL WAIT HERE! THERE'S RUBBISH EVERYWHERE BECAUSE THE WHOLE GAME IS RUBBISH!
YEAH, CHAMURAI, GO HELP PEPPA CLEAN THE WHOLE DAMNED FOREST! I'LL WAIT HERE! THERE'S RUBBISH EVERYWHERE BECAUSE THE WHOLE GAME IS RUBBISH!

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#8 bigsocrates  Online

Okay, look, we like to have fun here and all, but all kidding aside this game is legitimately awful. I understand it's for very small children but there's been no attempt made to actually make a game here. They've just taken mechanics that exist in other games and dumbed them down to the point where nothing you do matters and it's all just a mess. You can wander around and press A. That's it. People ask you questions and you can't even respond. I understand that young children can't necessarily read but they could have provided a simple "yes/no" option with voiced options or used some version of emoticons or a nodding/shaking head for yes/no. There were design options here and instead they just ignored them.

Mama pig just teleports all over. Maybe because they don't want to depict kids wandering around alone? Regardless it's lazy as hell.

Peppa's family is creepy as hell in the way they treat the new friend. Peppa's teacher tells you to hang your art in Peppa's home. This is a bunch of nonsense. Just let me play as Peppa if that's what you want. If you let me play as Peppa you could have fully voiced response options.

The whole thing is just shoddy and lazy and terrible and I think they want $40 for it off gamepass. It's insulting. Very young children deserve better than this. I understand you have to keep things simple and all that, but by the time kids are interested in video games they can do more complex stuff than THIS.

Also I hate Peppa Pig. When I was a kid we had Sesame Street and it's amazing how much worse TV for kids has gotten from the days of Mr. Rogers and Big Bird. Those shows attempted to impart adult lessons in ways that made sense to children. Peppa Pig just has someone make a dumb joke and then the whole family falls down laughing. It's awful.

I know you can't judge this even like something like Lil Gator Game, which is also intended for kids but for older kids who understand more and can read, but even on its own terms there's just nothing good or worthwhile here. It doesn't even try to be good or worthwhile. It just tries to be the bare minimum of a product that kids can demand from their parents.

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Man, this was a great time. What a way to live a life of no regrets.

Ok, real talk (or as Dan would say, "For shoot."), I did not enjoy this game and, frankly, the time to beat is a bald faced lie. There's no way it only takes 1 hour to beat. It feels like an eternity to go from one area to another or, in my case, not knowing what triggers a new event. I walked alllllll the way to Granny and Grandpa Pig's place, after I'd already been there a couple times already, in the hopes of finding something new on the other side but there was nothing. Instead of giving any kind of merciful mode of fast travel you are made to walk ever so slowly back past the chicken coop, past the literal pile of shit and Grandpa Pig's garden, past their house, past Mummy Pig and the random kite laying on the ground, past the mud puddle and FINALLY back at Peppa's house. But now what? Do I take the bikes and go right to the hot air balloon or the forest? I'd already done those and I don't want to repeat any activities cuz it takes forever to do them again. So, I'm afraid I am stuck in a baby game because I'm too afraid to click on Daddy Pig's car for a second time for fear of having to repeat the Windy Castle segment all over again.

Not to mention the dialogue. I have watched a little bit of the TV show with my child and I don't think I've heard TV Peppa talk with the same weird inflection that Game Peppa uses when she ends some sentences. I dunno, maybe that's how she actually talked on the show and I just didn't notice it but it sure seems weird when she talks like this.

As I played this on Game Pass and was not aware of the price until @bigsocrates mentioned it earlier but $40 is way too much for this.

But then, 523 Peppa Pig fans can't be wrong.
But then, 523 Peppa Pig fans can't be wrong.